Butt Fucking Movie of the Week: The Good, The Bad and The Ugly

Starting this Wednesday, every week I will post a movie from my collection of movies I love and recommend them to you to watch. And so, I give you in my opinion the greatest western ever created: The Good, The Bad and The Ugly.

The last movie of the A Few Dollars trilogy starring the titular character, The Man With No Name, this one is one setting the three characters, The Good: The Man With No Name (Clint Eastwood), The Bad: Angel Eyes (Lee Van Cleef) and The Ugly: Tuco (Eli Wallach) loose in a realistic gritty and unforgiving western world. The main plot is that Angle Eyes as the main villain is on the search for a crate of stolen gold worth thousands with The Man With No Name and Tuco joining in after stumbling upon information leading to the treasure. Along the way, The Man With No Name and Tuco run into a battle between the Confederates and the Union in a senseless blood fight over a bridge, finding themselves in a Union prison, defending themselves from a group of gunman and finally the mexican standoff between the three over the gold.

As usual, Clint Eastwood as The Man With No Name is fucking cool as fucking ice. There is no character that can showcase an extraordinary display of manliness. Eli Wallach is usually the light comedy relief as Tuco and is really likable and memorable. He has an interesting character to tell and is continually explored as the movie moves. Lee Van Cleef is the standout villain, menacing and a full on bastard of a man.

The opening scene involving the interrogation between Angel Eyes and a former soldier, who has settled down as a farmer with a family about the gold is one of the best scenes in film history. Its no wonder Quentin Tarantino being a fan of Sergio Leone played homage to that scene in the opening of Inglourious Basterds. At the end of this video is the part The Man With No Name shoots down three bounty hunters in fucking style. A must watch.

This is what being a villain was about. It fits the definition of a villain. Look at movies today. Finding a really great and memorable villain is close to impossible. Being a villain is in the eyes. If I become a director and cast an actor for a villainous role. No evil stare or evil glint. No fucking role. Go eat out of the fucking toilet.

The one thing Sergio Leone is really good at is creating an atmosphere and setting a scene. Partly thanks to Ennio Morricone's fantastic score for the film. Seriously, no Ennio Morricone, and I don't think this film would be as great as it is. Morricone scores are fucking epic and make any western great. Leone can drag a certain scene for quite some time but that's because of the build up. The scene slowly builds up and explodes in the front of your face.

Sergio Leone transformed the Western genre. Go see the Magnificent Seven then see any Western flicks after The Good, The Bad and The Ugly. And of course, Leone made Eastwood.

'There are two kinds of people in this world; those with guns and those that dig. You dig.'

Why I Watch What I Watch

When most people say they love movies, but what they mean is just watching mainstream cinema, in their own terms its correct.

When I say I love movies, I mean watching movies from every era, the classics, the critically acclaim, the entertaining, foreign and so on and so forth, and in the term itself I am correct.

From right: Faye Dunaway, Warren Beatty and Gene Hackman (Bonnie and Clyde)

Its all about exposure for me. Its a goal, a hobby. The list of 1001 movies to watch before you die. I've seen a quarter of them. Mention old films, the typical Malaysian would scoff and say, 'Why you wanna watch old movie one? Watch new lah. Better some more'

Well, to each his own.

I watch because I want to. Why is it that when I watch movies of present day and just find them to be average? Because I've seen it all done before, better and memorable. And the best part of having an expanded film exposure? Your criticism has better depth. Anyone can criticize but it take someone with true knowledge in the area of subject to be able to fully analyze and be able to effectively criticize a film. Its not just criticism, what would be the fun of being negative all the time? By taking the time to look through different movies other than the continuous mediocre (although entertaining, though forgettable) you build yourself, intellectually, individually and at all levels be a more improved person through the appreciation of arts.

The ever cool and late legendary actor Humphrey Bogart as the unforgettable Rick Blaine (Casablanca)

I take a finance course. Lets say you're a Malaysian student, just graduated and go to the US to pursue your career. You work at Wall Street. When somebody asks you what you do. You're are gonna say I work at Wall Street. Some would retort, 'A regular Gordon Gekko or a Bud Fox?' People my age would just stare confusingly and spiral into a tornado of depression and ultimately hang yourself with a Wii. You expose yourself and start watching the classics, start watching the films that have had cultural impact on the world you would know that Gordon Gekko and Bud Fox are characters from Oliver Stone's critically acclaimed 1987 film Wall Street. In a Halloween special for the TV show 'The Office' Ryan comes in dressed as Gordon Gekko and his girl friend Kelly says, 'Oh, are you supposed to be Larry King?' Ryan replies and says, 'No, I'm Gordon Gekko' Kelly just says, 'Who?' and Ryan stares helplessly into the camera and sighs. Amazed by the ignorance of Kelly. This really happens to me almost all the time.

Its not that I look down on those that don't watch the same movies I watch. I tried to get my group of friends to appreciate movies the way I do.

Didn't work. I lent one of my friends (due to keeping the name a secret I will use the initials ZKW a.k.a Zhen Ken Wong) three DVDs; Clerks, City of God and Three Kings. I took the time to rummage through my DVDs and selection of movies to find the three that would appeal to a person that prefers mainstream cinema. I lent it on the 20th of February and this is what he said, 'I look at the cover and it doesn't look nice to watch'.

Well, I did try.

Late legendary actor Steve McQueen as 'Cooler King' (Great Escape)

Recent TV shows and movies incorporate references to popular classic films of yesteryear and sometimes incorporate the influence of those films. Jokes are often made in regard to those films as well as parodies. You need to watch the film before hand to understand the joke.

Take for example, The Simpson's. If I didn't watch Reservoir Dogs (1991), A Space Odyssey (1968), A Fistful of Dollars (1964), Bonnie and Clyde (1967), One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest (1962), Citizen Kane (1941), Casablanca (1943), A Clockwork Orange (1971) and the such, would I not get the jokes. It would have still been funny, but by watching them then you realize how much funnier it is.

In one episode of the Simpson's where at the end the Native American who showed Bart his future, took off into the sunset by crashing through the window and running off. When I first saw it, I thought it was fucking random. After watching One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest.

I got it.

Jack Nicholson as McMurphy and Will Sampson as Chief (One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest)

Expose yourself. Watch every movie you can. Expand your film and pop culture knowledge. Movies affect our lives, it affects our philosophy, our ideology, our emotions, improves our understanding of social contemporary issues as well as political issues and the world. Watching the 'greats' will allow you to understand life as a whole. It will get you inspired.

Try watching a classic movie. You have all the time in the world. Take 2 hours off to watch a classic. Who nows? When you're watching a future TV show or a new movie in a cinema and there's a joke reference to that classic movie, you may be the one to get it.

And watch your other friends stare dumbfounded at the screen.

E3 2010

Apparently, there's this 'thing' called the 'World Cup' going around everywhere in the past few weeks. Being the video game geek I am, this once in four years world event passes by my membrane without a glance. The only consolation I have between me and the World Cup is the news results and highlights so I can pretend I'm a normal human being and say, 'Last nights match? Yeah, I watched it. Awesome stuff. I wasn't in no way playing Split Second throughout the whole match'

When June hits every year, my eyes are set only on the E3 Expo. The biggest video game convention. Someday, I would attend the expo. Maybe after I graduate. Nonetheless, its a future project.

Lots of great stuff coming out soon. And so, here are the video game bits unveiled at E3 2010:

DEAD RISING 2

Don't mean to brag, but I got Ending A in the 1st Dead Rising. Yeeeeaaap. Mighty tough shit to go through. I fucking love anything with zombies. Getting to modify weapons in Dead Rising 2? Fuck yeah! Get to put two chainsaws on a motorbike to fuck up hundreds of zombies? FUCK YEAH! Oh yeah, this time, the about a thousand zombies are able to fill up the screen. Oh yeah.

STAR WARS: FORCE UNLEASHED 2

Okay, the 1st one was a bit disappointing. I mean, the part where you had to take down the Star Destroyer? That was some fucking annoying shit. I spent most of the time getting into cover to avoid the blasters from AT's then come out periodically to throw stuff at it. Going at it close quarter was not a good idea with other storm troopers and heavy troopers shooting your ass. Hopefully, the 2nd fixes the combat problems and the story. You can't kill Paladin because its not the Jedi way but its okay to kill thousands of storm troopers and other living creatures? BS..

METAL GEAR SOLID: RISING

I don't own a PS3 so I didn't have a chance to play Metal Gear Solid 4 so having this ain't so bad. Its a far cry from being stealthy like Snake but getting to cut down everything and anything? I'd like to see how far the tech can go. Castration option? That would be brutal.

DEAD SPACE 2

The follow-up to the critically acclaimed Dead Space. The 2nd should be just as impressive. Just bought the 1st one to give it a go. I know its been almost a year plus, but I just got sidetracked by all the cool games appearing during that time. Fallout 3 was the game that threw Dead Space into the shadows.

FALLOUT: NEW VEGAS

I mentioned Fallout 3, I assume you can guess I'm eagerly anticipating this one. New world, new weapons, new karma system. I spent a good 100 hours on Fallout 3. I suppose the same can be expected from this one too.

TRANSFORMERS: WAR FOR CYBERTRON

Licensed games don't do so well. But this looks like a lot of potential. Getting to create your own transformer? That sounds fucking rad. Really hoping this would be good. And epic.

KANE AND LYNCH: DOG DAYS

The last one sucked in terms of gameplay. It redeemed itself in a good story and characters. But, seriously.. Whats Eidos doing? When they could be doing Hitman 5??!! Get your shit together and make fucking Hitman 5!!

GEARS OF WAR 3

Gears of War is the ultimate in manly gaming. Testosterone filled adrenaline shots down your dick. You can feel hairs growing on your fucking chest playing Gears of War. Picks up after the 2nd game. Human race threatened. Locusts on radioactive steroids. Time for Marcus and gang to rev up their chainsaws. Plus, we get to finally see where Marcus's father fits into the scene.

DEUS EX: HUMAN REVOLUTION

A prequel to the original, this one looks set to be as good as the last two. I really prefer FPS action RPG's to either JRPG's or traditional RPG's as it suits my tastes in shooters. Hopefully, modification is stretched and offers unlimited possibilities.

Yeah, so I'm missing a few games like Infamous 2, Killzone 3, The Last Guardian, Twisted Metal and The Agency but thats cause they can go fuck themselves. Seriously, system exclusivity has to go. I'm missing out on a lot of good shit here. I mean, COME ON!! Why is The Last Guardian fucking exclusive to PS3??!! Thats just unfair. Fuck you Sony. Fuck YOU!

Microsoft Kinect

Well, they changed the name from Project Natal to Microsoft Kinect. I prefer Natal. I can imagine telling people; 'Hey you guys, I just got a Kinect!' And they would reply; 'What? You got a Konek?' For the uninitiated, Kinect is the so called future of gaming. Using Kinect, games in the future will utilise full body motion of the player eliminating the need for controllers. Its still in the early phases though and is expected to be released at the end of 2011.

In the video, you should see Forza Motorsport using the Kinect controller. He's controlling the car by putting his two hands in front of him and using it like a steering wheel! Wowee! Downside? How do you brake? Use gears? Look sideways or back? As stated, Kinect's still in the early phases.

Imagine playing Call of Duty using Kinect or Star Wars or Street Fighter! But I can't help but feel I might be in for some massive disappointment when Kinect finally releases for the gaming market.

With games adopting full body motion, you know what this means. Yeah! Virtual SEX!! Virtual sex on 3D LCD TV's!!

Marvel Vs Capcom 3

Ten years ago. It was ten years ago that I played Marvel Vs Capcom: Clash of Superheroes to fucking death on the Playstation. Now we get the third in the series for the year of 2010. I remember always using Jin.

Jin pwned.

And I remember everybody else using Gambit.. Everyone wanted to fucking use Gambit. It was always Gambit Vs. Gambit.

The games slated for a spring 2011 release date. Capcom's announcement at E3 should give a more definite date. So far, those characters confirmed are:

Marvel: Captain America, Deadpool (Wooo!!), Wolverine, Hulk and Iron Man

Capcom: Chris Redfield (not sure what he can do..), Dante, Ryu, Felicia and Morrigan

What The Right Hand Is To The Left Hand

Have you ever wondered; 'Is it possible to achieve perfection of use in both hands?' I have. And if I have of course you have. You is me. Me is you. We're all the same. The only thing that's different is our concept. The perspective. And of course I'm able to pwn your shit in Modern Warfare 2.

My right hand shoots out Lvl 10 Sith Lightning but my left hand only manages a Lvl 1. Why is that? Why are humans born out of obstensity the limit of our body.

Your born. But your out of luck asshole. If your right handed, your fucking right handed. If your left handed, your fucking left handed. Tough shit.

There is a certain need to go against nature. To go against God himself and his so called creation. What would happen if I could actually write perfectly with my left hand. Wouldn't that blow the proportion of anti matter beyond the boundaries of the Milky Way.

I'm not even thinking when I'm writing anymore. Its just an impulse of creativity. I'm just that awesome.

PC FPS gaming demands your left hand squarely on the keys W,A,S,D plus C, R and 1,2,3,4 with right hand on mouse aiming for headshots. What if the roles were reversed? Just a criss-cross magnet? Would the hit frequency be over the average? Under? Or just hitting the mark?

I can't sleep at night.

Discussions of intrinsic value mean a lot to me. More mind. More power. To behest the propensity of the buyer towards the product.

Sir, would you like to buy this orange? Its in HD. Perfect for the upcoming World Cup. If you like football, then you will get this orange HD fruit to complete your life. Complete your very existence.

HD sells. If a prostitute were HD, I'd buy it.

I wish my right hand was HD and my left hand 3D LCD.

Miller's Crossing

The Coen Brothers sure know how to make a guy getting shot multiple times by a tommy gun look like a comedy.

Miller's Crossing is like one of those movies where the plot's so complicated and heavy, your left scratching your head after its finished. Although, its satisfying once you get it.

Gabriel Byrne = 1/4 Humphrey Bogart

Introduction

Insanity is not a curse. Rather, it is a condition that allows you to understand yourself and in turn understand the human mind. As the phrase says, the world is a crazy place and you need to be just as crazy to live in it. The insane will inherit the world, and those that do not embrace it will be hunted down for food.

Thats' the smart guy in my head writing that down. But of course, nobody wants to hear about what the smart guy wants to say.

Why is it that movies with huge amounts of CGI and special effects with no plot, character development and content do so well in the box office? Most aren't even good and yet when some people would proclaim them as 'TEH MOVIE OF THE YEAR!! ZOMG!!' The general public are in love with these movies and yet when I mention Citizen Kane or Pulp Fiction I receive glares of confusion accompanied by the 'never heard of it' or 'why would I wanna watch those movies'. I'm beginning to think that society is becoming less and less refined and less exposed. The film Idiocracy illuminates society's fall to stupidity. Need more proof? Two words: Justin Bieber.

The next fucked up generation would take over my generation and as it is, my generation has already been fucked sideways.

Why do I have this blog up and running?

Simple. So I can talk to myself.